Questionably NSFW

Jan Blok


Raptor Attacks

We are dedicated to a Velociraptor-Free workplace


It has proudly been:
1345
Days since the last Velociraptor Incident.
We're hiring!!


T E C H N I C A L     O P E R A T I O N S


Install give a fuck function - **CANCELED*



And Now Your Moment Of Zen



Unack'd Alarms
(Shit We're Ignoring)


2022-08-12 14:14:53 Informational fiji-netw-01.backup.thetopspage.com Information message detected in /var/log/messages on fiji-netw-01. Source: logger Message: * fijiexchange.office.thetopspage.com:MSEXCH: 46774:nsrxchsv:The backup of Sales failed; status is 0x000003e3.

2022-08-12 14:14:57 Warning dns6.finland.a.backhaul.thetopspage.com Disk Utilization (/DB1/DW/data8 on dns6.finland.a) - % Used exceeds threshold (> 90) Current disk utilization of /DB1/DW/data8 on dns6.finland.a (99.03%) is > 90%.

2022-08-12 14:15:00

2022-08-12 14:15:02 Warning tops-test.nodomain Disk Utilization (/dev on tops-test) - % Used exceeds threshold (> 90) Current disk utilization of /dev on tops-test (100.00%) is > 90%.

2022-08-12 14:15:05 Warning web2-moscow.backhaul.finland.thetopspage.com % Virtual Memory Used on web2-moscow exceeds 50.0%. Currently 67.99%. The Virtual Memory Used on web2-moscow exceeds 50.0%. Currently 67.99%. Excessive use of virtual memory may lead to major performance degredation.

2022-08-12 14:15:07 Warning auth-fiji.backup.thetopspage.com Warning message detected in /var/log/messages on auth-fiji. Source: rpc.statd Message: Caught signal 15, un-registering and exiting.

2022-08-12 14:15:08 Warning rsa2.thetopspage.com Run Queue Length on rsa2 exceeds 5.0. Currently 8 The Run Queue Length on rsa2 exceeds 5.0. Currently 8 for a sustained period of 0 minutes. This is a possible indicator of overtaxed processor(s).

2022-08-12 14:15:10 Warning dns64fiji-b.backhaul.thetopspage.com System Load exceeds 10.0. Currently 15.06. System Load exceeds 10.0%. Currently 15.06% for a sustained period of 5 minutes.

2022-08-12 14:15:11 Informational fiji-cricket1.backup.thetopspage.com Information message detected in /var/log/messages on fiji-cricket1. Source: nsca Message: Unknown option specified in config file '/usr/local/nagios/etc/nsca.cfg' - Line 38



Documentation



Todays Pseudo-Random
Lunch Suggestion Is

Wendys

Why Is Josh Missing?



TRAFFIC

Excuse O Rama

Vendor no longer supports the product