Questionably NSFW

Jan Blok


Raptor Attacks

We are dedicated to a Velociraptor-Free workplace


It has proudly been:
1055
Days since the last Velociraptor Incident.
We're hiring!!


T E C H N I C A L     O P E R A T I O N S





And Now Your Moment Of Zen



Unack'd Alarms
(Shit We're Ignoring)


2021-10-27 00:10:52 Warning fijiexowa.office.thetopspage.com Disk Utilization (C:\\u005c on fijiexowa) - % Used exceeds threshold (> 94.0) Current disk utilization of C:\\u005c on fijiexowa (94.02%) is > 94.0%.

2021-10-27 00:10:56 Informational wacapp-moscow.backhaul.finland.thetopspage.com Information message detected in /var/log/messages on wacapp-moscow. Source: hdavTester Message: CRITICAL: Scan of /usr/local/hdavTester/cleantestfile.txt failed with exit code #255. Incoming ticket attachments from this device are not getting scanned and will not be available for download via Portal or Helpdesk.

2021-10-27 00:10:59 Major mysqlmon.backhaul.thetopspage.com Heartbeat Failure occurred on mysqlmon No Heartbeat Received in the Last 57:17 minutes. The agent on mysqlmon may not be running. The agent server may be offline or there is no network connectivity between this agent and its relay.

2021-10-27 00:11:01 Major mysqlmon.backhaul.thetopspage.com Heartbeat Failure occurred on mysqlmon No Heartbeat Received in the Last 57:17 minutes. The agent on mysqlmon may not be running. The agent server may be offline or there is no network connectivity between this agent and its relay.

2021-10-27 00:11:04 Warning web20-fiji.backhaul.thetopspage.com % Virtual Memory Used on web20-fiji exceeds 50.0%. Currently 69.22%. The Virtual Memory Used on web20-fiji exceeds 50.0%. Currently 69.22%. Excessive use of virtual memory may lead to major performance degredation.

2021-10-27 00:11:06 Informational fiji-shield-1.backhaul.thetopspage.com Information message detected in /var/log/messages on fiji-shield-1. Source: runHourlyAggregation Message: CRITICAL: runHourlyAggregation: Invalid data received in the device column (column 1) of the input file

2021-10-27 00:11:07 Warning logbox3-fiji.backup.thetopspage.com Warning message detected for switch/router (192.168.244.6) Source: 192.168.244.6 Message: SEC_LOGIN-4-LOGIN_FAILED: Login failed [user: daffyduck] [Source: 10.5.23.75] [localport: 22] [Reason: Login Authentication Failed] at 20:47:14 UTC Tue May 25 2015

2021-10-27 00:11:09 Warning web25-moscow.backhaul.finland.thetopspage.com Disk Utilization (/mysql/data-web25 on web25-moscow) - % Used exceeds threshold (> 90) Current disk utilization of /mysql/data-web25 on web25-moscow (92.85%) is > 90%.

2021-10-27 00:11:10 Warning web17-fiji.backhaul.thetopspage.com Disk Utilization (/mysql/data-web17 on web17-fiji) - % Used exceeds threshold (> 90) Current disk utilization of /mysql/data-web17 on web17-fiji (94.35%) is > 90%.



Documentation



Todays Pseudo-Random
Lunch Suggestion Is

Pollo Campero

Why Is Josh Missing?



OIL CHANGE

Excuse O Rama

Too many little pins on CPU confusing it, bend back and forth until 10-20% are neatly removed. Do _not_ leave metal bits visible!